Pinelake H3 Hash #1113
September 20, 2008
Blue Ball Special and Bone Hole (plus Middle School Boy and Max)


The Pinelakers made yet another trip OTP to Roswell, meeting up at Big Creek Park. Our hares were aware that this is quite the mountain biker hang out, and there was even some kind of festival for people who can’t run mountain bikers going on. They figured bikers wipe out early and often, and would be long gone by 2pm. WRONG! There were zillions of bikers and cars, which gave the hounds a bit of trouble finding parking. But at last, we all assembled on time. Actually, all of us except for Star Whore, who’s got a bum leg which makes her drive slower (because she can’t walk fast…?)

Hounds and hares assembled for no special instructions, except Pisssticide’s insistence that he had ended many hashes just over yonder, down the power line cut… The dead trail started right in the middle of biker central, and followed the park path for a ways. First check was found by Niplets (shocking!) who immediately hauled off in the wrong direction. Pisst and Lots of Practice found true trail, taking them right into the woods and the mucky-mucky. Trail wound it’s way through the creek, some good swamp-a-licous shaggy, under GA-400, back in the creek, back out, through more swamp…

Bone Hole and Blue Ball, left us a lovely CB10 ¾ of the way through trail, assumedly expecting a bigger crowd, and such a thing necessary for keeping the pack together. Instead, Niplets and Butt Floss found it long before anyone else and took off boxing. Pissticide, on his own, decided to box North, and got very, very off trail. Meanwhile, Yassir Creamer and Practice stumbled upon the count back, cursed those evil hares, and headed back toward trail. They met up with the lolly-gaggers (Two Buck Fuck, Drags Wood, et al) just in the nick of time, and the bunch set off back into the creek. Lots of Practice decided to practice her swan dive technique while running across the creek, receiving a 7.2 from the Russian judge and a very wet set of clothes. The hounds made it out of the creek ad found themselves in a Mexican apartment complex. They also were confused to find Pissticide coming up behind them, looking tired and feeling stupid for his bright boxing plan.

After a lovely jaunt down a utility access road, back under 400 and across the creek again, the hounds scrambled up a slippery embankment to find a much-needed “BN” and the On-In, exactly where Pissticide said it would be. Much beer was had while we waited for late-arrival Asspacker, plus two dogs, to make it the end. We gave up waiting. It was also realized that something interesting had happened on trial, because Star Whore observed that Bukkake Bill had some dirty hand prints across his chest-icles, and Lots of Practice was wearing lots less clothes than she had started the day with.

Once circle began, Star gave them each down-downs for their risqué trail behavior. As there was lots of beer and few hashers, EVERYONE got a down-down (or two, or three) – our hash Virgins, Just Crystal and Nathaniel (the junior co-hare); the hares; Niplets for FRB-ing and being born; Foreign Lesion and Yassir for too long gone; Butt Floss and Pissticide for overly fancy accoutrement (who runs with a Rolex? Really?); Ballerina Booty Boy for his Larry Craig moment with some young-in on a bike… Yassir got a second for letting Papa Smurf – aka a blue cupcake – leave a little sticky icky on his face. Drags Wood and Two Buck had theirs for wearing a fancy new watch and getting too close to a Black Widow, respectively. Asspacker arrived just in time for a down-down, and the hashers headed off into the sunset.

Scribe: Lots of Practice